Bronze's The New Silver (Part 1)

I just can help it but to browse thru shoe websites every morning when i arrive work. Then dreaming them to fit into my foot and wishing that im filthy rich to actually wear different pairs daily for the whole year..which means i wud own 365 pairs of fabulous shoes all year round..aaahhh..

Anyway, the discovery of this seasons hottest colors..anything that's BRONZE..its fabulous..it'll go well in your party ensembles, and pub & bars outing..so cantikk okaaayy..Throw away your silver or gold shiny shoes people...thats a passe'...

Here are the nominess..

Salvatore Ferragamo's bronze dressers

Gucci Copper colored mocassins

Gucci bronze colored mocassins

Tod's bronze colored sneakers

Such fab shoes..with a tag that can starve you..FOOD of FOOT? Your pick...U'll definitely know what mine is.. =)

*There are several other shoes im suppose to post but my boss just got it. biatch.*

Spice Girls for TESCO

The Spice Girls are already starting their World Tour. I came across this video and its hillarious! Eventho i have the hatred towards Victoria Beckham due to her annoying personality and an attention seeker and thinking she's the greatest women in the world that only clothes can make her look pretty but her looks isn't, there's no reason to 'X' on the rest of the members.

Check it out..




And also check out their latest single music video titled Headlines (Frenship Never Ends) and tell me u feel like vomiting when u see Victoria Beckham posing like a wannabe supermodel whereas everyone else was cool and relaxed. Its a slow song Victoria, not a photo shoot for Vogue. U wish..

Obsessive Compulsive Personality Disorder (OCPD)

I think i have a problem. I think i have a sickness...and i think its getting a bit worse...by the day. But i dont think its wrong..its just being..perfect.. I dunno why, but im just too clean and im into symmetrical arrangements. Some of the events that i could remember are:

• I get this wonderful indescribable satisfaction by looking at a car getting washed and polished to perfection. Especially when using that machine spinning polisher thingy. I also get the excitement when i see a dirty car, and imagining how wonderfully satisfying if i get to clean it to perfection and making it look brand new. Sick?

If only u knew how i feel when i look at this before & after effect..

• I like things to be in symmetrical. How i arrange things at home, the shampoo's in the toilet, all at a perfect gradient from high to low, at a certain spacing between one another, and the same row. Everytime when i get into the toliet, the first thing i would do is ensure everything is aligned and organized according to my obsession. It would be very disturbing in my mind when i look at things not 'symmetry'. It would like give me a 'tick' in a head and it points out that the object infront of me is highly 'disturbing' my mental calmness.

• I would also dry the toilet after showering thinking that being in a dry toilet gives me a wonderful luxury feeling. But i cant do it all the time coz i live with a housemate and he tends to wet the floor whenever he's in there. It would take alot of my time to perform such act. But how lovely if i have it dried.

• I dont fancy or hate to see things in A-symmetrcial form. anything that's not balance in form. multiple objects should be of the same size. If it doesnt, it shud be in gradient.

• Im so tidy and hygienically freaky that i now have Dettol Wipes with me everywhere i go. Mostly used to wipe the toilet seat if i need to do my 'business'.

• I also have this thot sometimes whenever i dine outside at a restaurant or cafes; to carry and use my own sets of cutleries. I tend to question the cleanliness of the utensils used when im eating out and it runs around in my mind when i look at the spoon or fork im using, and how i have to share with the rest of the world and god knows how many human beings have already used them. It crossed my mind at times that if they can give me a hot boiling water for me to allow my spoon and fork sterilized.

• I get disturbed when things around me are not at the same position as i left it. Things such as the ironing board, the iron wire not folded or removed from the power socket. I would think of the dangerous things that might occur if it does, such as power search or maybe forgetfulness of switching it off and may cause fire in the house. The positioning of stuff or products in the house. probably the coffee jar or sugar jar after someone used it. It has to be in the same position, same coordinates as it was first taken. I'll get mental disturbance if it's in a different position. WORSE, if its been transfered to another LOCATION. i feel like screaming.

Im enjoy this where people despise performing this

• I cant see a wrapped food or probably chips opened by just tearing it and creating an uneven-like opening to the wrapper. I would prefer to use scissors and cut it in a straight line. thats why i carry scissors with me.

• i cant deal looking at ring water spots on a table. usually coming from cold drinks that evaporates and with no coasters underneath. it 'ticks' me.

This would kill me

• I can deal eating in a house at any location in the house, weather infront of the Tv, in the kitchen, in the room, wherever. I just cant stand crumbs of food on the floor or as such. If something were to spill, as the moment a drop of crumb or water drips responding to gravity pull and has nothing to save it from heading down down down to the carpet.. my mind goes berserk from the moment the food floats till it hits the floor.

• And the list goes...

An article i read in the internet trying to understand the probability of maybe theres something wrong with me..

"Obsessive-compulsive disorder is often confused with the separate condition obsessive compulsive personality disorder. The two are not the same condition, however. OCD is ego dystonic, meaning that the disorder is incompatible with the sufferer's self-concept. Because disorders that are ego dystonic go against an individual's perception of his/herself, they tend to cause much distress.
OCPD, on the other hand, is ego syntonic—marked by the individual's acceptance that the characteristics displayed as a result of this disorder are compatible with his/her self-image. Ego syntonic disorders understandably cause no distress. Persons suffering from OCD are often aware that their behavior is not rational and are unhappy about their obsessions but nevertheless feel compelled by them.
Persons with OCPD, by contrast, are not aware of anything abnormal about themselves; they will readily explain why their actions are rational, and it is usually impossible to convince them otherwise. Persons with OCD are ridden with anxiety; persons who suffer from OCPD, by contrast, tend to derive pleasure from their obsessions or compulsions.^[14] This is a significant difference between these disorders"

I confess that i am a person who's suffering from an Obsessive Compulsive Personality Disorder (OCPD). No one can talk me out of it...never...It is something that never bothers my mind if i were to think of it, but just at times maybe i think im a lil too much, but with no bad feelings..but also i think its a good thing for me, but probably not for others surrounding me.

A Million Loneliness..

4 years ago, i get to know someone online..we chatted online, we dated, but things didnt work out due to some reasons. he happened to be someone with a title. he worked hard to get where he is, and blessed with all the money in the world..possibly worth an estimated RM100 million or probably more..im not kidding..with 7 huge companies under his belt..oil & gas, engineering, construction, shipping & logistics, all single handedly owned by him..what a success..he would be the most eligible bachelor in town. 42 years old, tall, fair, single, and has an ocean of money..His name is Dato' D..i remembered he has the whole floor of basement carpark at his condo to himself. to park all of his 10 cars and 5 superbikes. namely a red Ferrari, a BMW X5, an SLK Roadster Mercedes, an M3 BMW convertible, a Bentley, a Maserati, a Volkswagen Beetle convertible and many more that u never wish to own in a million years.

Maserati

BMW Super X5

A car J.Lo also own..a Bentley

M3 BMW Convertible

A sexy red Ferrari

CLK Mercedes Roadster

i also happen to know another fella, the same age group, very successful and deals with the world financial institution, and wud say, a catch for any ladies to marry.

well, get ready ma ladies, both gentleman are not into women, and very very closeted.

Dato' D asked me out for drinks after a long silence from both of us. I think its been 6 months. The first sms said he wanted to come visit me in Doha. i replied "u insane? i left Doha 4 months already". Much earlier, we sms'd each other on planning to meet for coffee..we set the date 1 week later.


During the meeting, he let out everything that was bothering his mind..he was depressed and very much lonely..he's in need of a fren..a gay fren..or make it a boyfren..some1 of a companion. As i listened to him chatting his way of depression, my mind was trying to link all the things we use to do when we were dating and all the things he had done to me in previous. he was a very angry man, selfish, physically abusive and inconsiderate sun of a bitch..during that time, he thinks he has money and he cud control everything around him, including his r'ship..but not with me..being rich is a bonus, but how connected ur heart is, a must..i made a killer remark on him previously quoting;

"U can never buy happiness. U think u have all the money u can control people around u? Maybe u can..but not with me. After what u've done to me, trust me..u'll end up alone! U'll get all this low life pathetic blood sucking gayboys who's aftering ur cash, cars & credit cards..not ur heart..never come crawling back at me!"

He looked down and accepted all the allegations i said in previous. that was 4 years ago and he admitted..it even cost him a Mini Cooper to shut a mouth of this gayboy from revealing his status to public or even cause commotion at his workplace. how pathetic..

Will this shut ur mouth?

I told him that im attached with some1. he was happy i met some1 nice for myself, even tho im here in KL and he's in UK. At Dato D's position, some1 from the moon would mean the world to him, as long as the frenship has honesty. he said distance was not an issue..no doubt its tough, but it depends on the sacrifice and many other things aligned. well, we're here not to discuss bout my life, more on his..

He spends a whole chunk of his money on properties, fancy cars, designer outfits and god knows what else he doesnt own..If i owned a Prada A/W 2007 slipper, i would like clean it weekly and store it in a good dry place and worship it, but in his case, its a slipper to be worn in the house or to pasar malam..when some1 reach that stage, money is not an object anymore. its all purchases to prevent loneliness..

"i am so sad ezwan..the more expensive and extravagant a purchase, it represents the more bitter loneliness i am actually..."

i cud imagine his cars and properties all arranged in line. its hell of an expensive depression. with his current spending on the Troika Posh Condo at the high end golden triangle designed by Norman Foster, tagged at a whopping RM9 million..glass penthouse.thats hell of a costly depression aint it? well, rezeki masing2..he worked hard and deserve every penny spent..and people cant just take it away from him or use the easy way in..

The Troika, 10 most expensive luxury condos in Malaysia.


penat lelah dia bekerja siang dan malam, takkan senang2 orang nak tumpang makan hasil susah payah dia bekerja..walaupun tak banyak bagi dia..tapi tetap dia bekerja keras untuk ada apa yang dia ada..

i take that as something for all of us to ponder upon..

he wants us to remain frens, as he thot i was so far the sincerest fren he knew..with that, i hold on to, and trust to be a fren for him..with his experience in business and where he is at the moment in life..how i wish to be successful like him and the other fren in future. .

On my way back home, in my car, i started to think..how could a person worth RM500 million get so depressed and feel ever so lonely? when u can get anything u ever want in this life..and then i knew, out of all the things in the world u can purchase...loneliness is the only thing...not even a trillionaire can buy...and it makes me more appreciative towards my other half, my family, my best frens..and tried to put myself at Dato D's position...its a suffering..even if i im able to own all the things i want in life, my loved ones are the most priced possession..

A Smiley Scratch

Something bad happened to me today. I parked my car at the open space parking opposite my office as usual. Then during lunch hour, i decided to drive home to take a nap coz i was just darn sleepy at work. At about 2pm, i came back to the parking lot looking for a space to park, but there were no spaces left, except one. It was behind all the motorbikes parking area. The indian parking attendant fella gave a sign to park at this particular spot. so, i did. I then wasnt comforable with that space and said;

"Annehh..boleh park sini ah? tarak blocking motor nak keluar nanti ke?" he replied, "Boleh..itu parking kereta punya. Motor boleh keluar ikut itu depan"

I took that as an assurance that my car wuld be a okaay..

At 4pm, my office mate decided to leave early to head home. 5 mins later, he called me up saying..

"Why is there a smiley face on your car?" i suddenly start to giggle and answered "haha..what are you saying?" he then replied "someone carved a smiley face on your car. Its so obvious at a near distance, but from far not so"

My eyes started to popped out it felt almost spitting out of the socket and my heart suddenly stop. i asked "are you bloody sure??" he said "come here and see it for yourself"

I then rushed my way down and cross the ever life threatening busy road to the open car park to check out the car. This was it..my little black buggy..

At that moment, both of us were not smiling, except for that graffiti crafted pathetically on my car. Its like smiling on me with god knows what message the craftman tried to potray or convey a message to me. It was just heart wrenching and i almost came down to tears. i knowm its no BMW coz i would just have fainted there and then, but its my precious lil buggy.I was so sad..

Then it came into my mind and trying to figure out the potential untalented craftman who did this to my car. I had 2 people in mind, and they were:

1) The motorbiker parked infront of me who had trouble to get his bike coz i was blocking his way, but there were ample space when i checked. It was impossible for him to get all upset and i dont see the trouble of him removing his vehicle and ever squatting down to paint art on my car using his keys.

2) This unfortunate old faggot with red hair and smells of cheap perfume that carry's an awful looking messanger bag whom i always bump into at the parking, and always tried to make a move one me. I never responded and there was this once we took the same lift and he gave me this 'despise' look coz i didnt respond to his so called frenly close encounter.

Im just lost of words and just take it as it is..My car had been '"arted & crafted"

If its the motorcyclist, i hate you for what you've done coz im saving to get myself new glasses as im getting blinder by the day. And must be darn stupid thinking that ur bike is the size of a lorry and require an olympic size pool area to remove your fucking cheap bike.

If its the old faggot, there are other ways to deal with rejection. This is not the way to put things in perspective or trying to prove that ur hot, coz ur not.

Im officially not only 'sightly' challenge by the hour, but also financially challenge by the day.

I'll be driving a smiling car everyday from now but the driver is not until i get it fixed.

I rest my case.

Blurry

I've had glasses since my uni years. It has been almost 7 years that i've not updated my glasses. I dont like the idea to wear contact lenses nor will i wear glasses. The thing is, i have astigmatism(rabun malam). Usually, at 6.00pm onwards, my eye sight would go all blurry & lights would bubble up thus making my vision pathetic. Nowadays, my vision has gotten worse and i tried to ignore it, but its bothering me a lot.

My frens say that im ignoring the fact that im getting "OLD". Isn't that rude?? so kurang hajar u ollss..i'm only 26 this year you bloody bitches. Im young, fabulous and so many things awaits me in future. Anyway, the thing about this post is that im so sad and upset that my Emporio Armani drivies (comes from the word drive and movie) glasses is officially....BROKEN.

I have it with me for 6 years. The screw had broken and the joints have so called rusted. Its so sad..so lama dah i owned those glasses. The memories that i had worn during my classes at Uni. Now, driving at nite is such a hassle that sometimes its dangerous for me.. I need new glasses now and bloody &)%$#$@. That will cost money and so sakit hati..Will hunt for one soon..duittt laggiiii....bye2 my little armani..

My ambition

Dear God,

Bismillah hirrahma nirrahim..

I will work hard to own these gorgeous pair of shoes. If i own them, it means that i've achieve what i want in life, i've made it in life & nothin else matters in the world. I will promise to behave and never leave my prayers behind. Also, im ever willing to turn straight if its the requirement to own these fabulous work of art by Salvatore Ferragamo.

I promise not to be cruel, mean, garang and cold towards people around me. I will also promise not ever to shop on expensive footwear again. Only if i own this pair, then i would stop. If not, i would still do it. So, better let me own them. Or else, im just 25 pairs away from the selling price of this shoe. Well, another 10 years probably would get me 25 new pairs of shoes..anyway, this shoe picture will be hung in my house and framed nicely. It will act as my ambition, my target and what fulfills my life..Knowing there's something out there..waiting for me..

Salvatore Ferragamo Alligator Skin Laceys

Priced - USD$ 7,500 or RM 28,500

The Lift

Today was such a busy day for me..not at work, but outside doing work and also doing some errants. I gotto work at about 9.00am. As i got infront of the office door, it was still locked! I happen to be the first person to arrive at work today. Biadap sangat. Officially, our working starts at 8.30am, but everyone just being so taiko and datang so the very lambat..fine. I was the person to so called potong reben and got myself in.

Before that, something irritating happened on my way up to the office. I experience a very uncomfortable situation in the lift this morning where 3 malay PLU's were in the lift with me. there were soh..seh..soh..seh..(gossiping) and i could here the word 'cover' and 'tu lah' somewhere in their sentence..sambil tergiggle2 manja kakak2 3 orang itiew..sakit hati plak bila terdengar..3 againts 1 kan..so, i just remain quiet (dlm hati berkata "nanti kau!")

The smell inside the lift was just outrageous due to the combination of 4 strong perfume smelling men (men ker??) and filled the air of the small lift car that is so..SMALL. I felt nauseous and almost wanted to faint probably because the air composition in the lift had only left with 20% of oxygen and 80% was the smell of an overdosed alcohol perfume coming from 4 queens. One of them was ok looking, whereas the other 2, sadly, couldnt be saved. Even with a Creme De La Mer Moisturizer that cost RM1,000 for 30 ounce, kelopakan cinta dimuka mereka berdua agak sebesar planet mars..Finally they got out at Level 27 and tergetik2 when they left. As the door shut, i know, deep down, i shall have my revenge fo them. Sakit hati teramat sangat..sambil mengetap-ngetap gigi kat bibir yang lucious ni..

Nobody can mess with>>>Yang Teramat Mulia Toh Puan Tunku Putri Menjalara Intan Bendahara Dihilir Che Engku Seri Paduka Perempuan Muda Seri Nara Lelawangsa Hajjah Raja Eleena Safia Kasih binti YM Raja Safian, isteri tercinta Yang Teramat Mulia AAA.

(Ketua Pemuda Isteri-Isteri Sosialit Pembesar Muslimah-La Queen)

I will ensure they will suffer the consequences..im just waiting for the chance to bump into either one of them soon with my whole clan..especially at the club or pubs or just between me and them anywhere at my workplace..and give them the latest version of my clans mean girls attitude...Nanti kau..

Dear Mr Derek Lam of Tod's..

Dear Mr Derek Lam,

I was at KLCC with my best buddies. Then suddenly my heart beat stopped as i saw these gorgeous pair of driving tassled oxfords. I know u as the Creative Director of the fablous Tods. I got a little bit retarded and got my finger prints all over the window display and i was practically drooling all over it. I then dragged my fag hag fren, Sharline into your shop and had had had to try it on to see how it looked like on my feet.

For your info, i was also wearing your last season's Spring Summer 2007 hottest gorgeous Gommini driving shoe of patent leather. Without delay, i slipped off my driving shoes and slipped on your new Fall / Winter 2007 loafers, size 8 1/2. I felt like a queen for a minute when i had the shoe on me and walked towards the mirror for view.

IT WAS FABULOUS......!!! I FELL IN LOVE SO DEEPLY AND NEVER WANT TO GET IT OFF MY FOOT...
I know its no glass slipper of cinderella's...but it was a glass slipper for me..for this season lah..It best worn with dark washed denim jeans..Its a classic look with a touch of class..simply elegant..

I would like to congratulate you for the fantabulous design, comfort and class on every inch of the shoe. Im just..speechles..and lost of words to describe how indeed obsessed i am with this shoe..

With a price tag of RM1,400...i consider it reasonable...well, compared to a Prada, Gucci or Ferragamo that cost minimum RM1,900 a pair..Louis Vuitton, mind you, starts at RM2,300...where at this point in life, im no near a Louis Vuitton. I could still starve for a Prada, Gucci or Ferragamo shoe. If i afford an LV, i would have died of starvation due to lack of nutrients & bankruptcy coz every penny i have would all be distributed to my feet instead of other parts of my body and bones.

Just to let u know, i love what u created..im just...head over heals and still trying to get back to earth..coz im still floating in space..dreaming of flying with those loafers on me...

visit www.tods.com for further excitement and stress.

Home Makeover

I was at home last weekend for 6 days in a row..2 days (Wednesday & Thursday) was on MC, Friday was the Merdeka Public Holiday. I had to stay home with my leaking nose and killer sore throat..

Well, what did i do for 6 days when i was at home? Those who know me well would definitely know..my house was totally bacteria free, everything was in super order and dust free for all 6 days..my kitchen, my room, my living and my toilet looked like i lived in a showroom at Ikea. In order, aligned and too scary for others to actually live in it..i find it homely, others may find it rigid, not homely and like a living Courts Mamooth commercial..well..welcome to the world of the living "Stepford Wives Club"...they do exist..never get them bored at home or staying too long in a house.things might get too...CLEAN..

After the 4th day, believe me, i ran out of things to arrange, clean, tagged or scrub..then i decided to leave the house to get me sane for a while and away from perfection.

I think thats why my housemates tend to mess up the house..in order for me to get buzy, and not perfectionalised their living..

Here are the displays..

Call me a freak of nature, but no Sean Cody porn could give me the orgasm i experienced after creating this dust & bacteria free environment..not even a single particule..nada! I LOVE ME.

Sick..

Today marked our nation's 50th independance day. Fireworks sparkle in the clouds of Putrajaya, Dataran Merdeka and other venues. Most of my frens were out to celebrate the eve with outings and having a jolly good time at the clubs. Club entries gone sky high with almost RM50 per entry compared to usually RM10-RM25 on normal weekends. Well, i dont blame them. Its once a year event and the only time when they try to suck out patrons money for fantastic music. Not to forget, new year's eve as well..these are the 2 holidays that most of the nightclubs would charge horrendously. I on the other hand, had to stay home coz i was sick with high fever, flu and cough. It was terrible. I couldnt even taste food!! If i were given an old car tire to chew on, it would have tasted the same like chewing a roasted chicken. My taste sense was just not functioning due to the bad flu. I hate it!!

My fever was on & off during the day.Sometimes i feel really heated up. I could feel that my body temperature was rising. Im now resting at home. Since today is Friday, most of the people i know are off to Frangipani Bar to chill. I wish to follow, but my condition does not allow. I would worsen my condition. Also i would have spent plenty money for the outing. Not only would i get myself a new frock to go for the outing, also the drinks and mamak sessions after. I've been saving alot these days and try to control all the tempations. Its part of my plan to save and get the chance to visit my sayang in UK after raya. Hopefully, it'll go thru and i get to hug him in real life instead of sms's of *hugs*.Anyway, back to the story bout nite outings, not that i drink alcohol, i used to, but i quit and swore not to drink and get wasted, starting the day i left for that terrible Doha to work. Well, i did it. Anyway...many things happen throughout the month. The highlite would be my best buddy, Aziz, that broke off for the 2nd time with his evil pretentios pathetic ashhole heartbreaker kampung bastard boyfren, Fid.

He broke my Aziz's heart once, then Aziz gave it another try. I knew it wasnt a good idea. He cheated on him. I tried to talk Aziz out of it, but you can do nothing when someone really cherish something and ever so in love. Love is blind.. People tend to forgive and forget. I on the other hand may forgive, but i can NEVER forget..

The thing is, i was once in his situation. I know how it feels. It was hurtful, dredful, u feel like killing the guy and many more suicidal action that may take place at that time. I just didnt want him to experience what i did before. But at times, its better for someone to learn it by himself, rather then getting advices from others. So, being a good fren to Aziz, i am happy if he is..Eventually,they were back together. Fid promised Aziz that he wouldnt hurt him anymore, he couldnt live without him, he was a mess, blah..blah..blah..Aziz took him back. Aziz set a trial period to see how serious of Fid wanting to patch things back with him. But instead, i would say, it was a strategy of Fid to loose all the misreable feelings burdened on his mind and by getting back together, his mind would be at peace...SICK kan?

Well, to cut the story short, Oopss..he did it again..Aziz found out that he had other 'encounters' and lied his way pathetically. FYI, my Aziz is a smart fren, we share things together, we strategise and learn from each other..The thing is, never challenge or lie to an intelligent gay men..we have both chromosome of the male and female in us..its like going againts 2 people instead of 1. There's a female and a male with double the power of intelligence and double the planning of strategies. We are abnormal beings, only smarter, gorgeous, creative and innovative at every inch compared to the heterosexuals. Dont mess with us..but our only witness would be...when we're in LOVE...our so called 'powers' tend to decrease as the love meter rises..but u must always have a gorgeous sidekick (thats me) to hit u on the head and get u on ur feet and get u to realise something bad is to happen to you.

This time around, my Aziz was smarter.He decided to leave him and he wasn't that devastated compared to the 1st time it happened. I know my fren grew wiser, smarter and knows the value of a relationship. I was proud of him, eventho, i know deep down, he must have felt a lil hurtful kick inside. well, its not a train reck kinda feeling like the first time, probably a light smack on the head by someone. Macam kena tujah kepala tetiba ngn orang yang tak kenal cemtuu..mesti mcm sakit hati & like apahal nihhh?? Wondering why on earth this unknowned person hit me? u know..that kinda feeling..

Anyway, its good that things ended and i wil ensure Fid will be the talk of the town. Being Mr. Gossiper and the kalau ezwan tahu memang satu dunia tahu kinda attitude, i shall do my part..i shall destroy his life as the same way he crushed my best buddy's heart.

Its a small world Firdaus..Again, ur messing with an intelligent bimbo here who dresses well and have fabulous shoes (tibe jerr). Referring to the Delta Nu's from Legally Blonde 1 & 2, i shall contact the other party boys personnels worldwide (im not kidding, we have malaysian PLU delegates from all countries including Somalia that i keep contact with incase i need a place to stay if im in their area) and let them know what u did and trash ur future and pathetic reputation in the PLU community. Lucky that u dont shop at the places we do, else i would even get the promoters and shop assistant to spit and puke all over you and thrash u out of good taste. Gay species like u should be thought a lesson.Bak kata adek2 semelaya "Cantik ke...!!??" My fren dont deserve all this after what he's done for you..u fat horrible unfortunate foolish whore!

To my dear Aziz, i dedicate this song to you..Ur fabulous, ur gorgeous, ur intelligent..its not right, but its ok..ur gonna make it anyway..There are many other rainbow fish in the sea..sabar nok..pasti dapat tangkap ikan 'BESAR' nanti untuk mengisi 'RUANG' yg kosong tuhh..The important thing is, u've experienced LOVE and it's a wonderful feeling..It gives u the best ultimate fantastic feeling in the world and it can also give u the ultimate worse feeling god ever can give to mankind..

The Simpson's version of me

I got this webpage from Aziz. U can actually create a character of urself to be part of the Simpson's Animation. It's really cool..Follow the steps in the website and you get to create 'you' in the Simpson animation..take a look at 'me'...hehehe..at Springfield.. Cant wait to watch the movie soon..have fun ya'll...

you can create 'you' at www.simpsonizeme.com

Flashing Sushi..

Yesterday when i was at home, i encountered a porn DVD that i tried to watch long time ago but couldnt get it to work. I then give it a try again..and..boom! the show was on..the title was "Locker Room Fantasy"..the movie was about college gym guys locker room, where a hidden camera was installed at a very strategic location. i could see all the guys walking around naked with their manly lump hanging and chit chatting with each other. IT WAS A MAJOR TURN ON to watch these guys. and most important of all..they're all STRAIGHT college dudes.. Also, going thru my 'secret box' of lust, i couldnt help but laugh at all the collections i had in my keepings for years and all dusty..They're all named after famous movies but 'porn'ified it. some of the titles like Lets Tie Tan Nick (Titanic), When Harry Met Larry (When Harry Met Sally), Saving Ryan's Private (Saving Private Ryan), The ASSistant ANALyst (The Analyst), Armed-And-Get-Down(Armageddon), In De Pants Day (Independance Day), and the list goes.


Referring to the movie bout locker room guys, the thing is, its fine for them to walk around naked in the shower or even shower together. staight men here we're talking about. The guys were all casual, cool and comfortable in their skin, flashing and swinging their dicks all over the locker room. NON of them experienced a hard on. if i were in the group, my dick would be pointing upwards, but none of them were. that's the difference my dear.. The culture in malaysia or mostly asian countries are not like that. we are more sopan i suppose. its like rude to flash ur dicks..anyway..

I experience many occasions at my work place where some of my office colleague perform a 'flash dance' routine in the mensroom..there was once, my colleague was peeing in the urinal. i was washing my hands at the sink. he was talking to me while he was on the go. as he turned, i assume he was done and all zipped up..but instead..he's 'stuart little' was still 'intact' instead of 'hanging' and made his way to the sink. i pretended not to look at it, but i couldn't help it when he turned his body facing me and 'washing' it while still talking to me.

At a mere 5 seconds i experience the view of his manhood with all the messy pubic hair sticking out of his undies and so called surrounding his manhood like a california roll sushi..i quickly change my eyesight direction and concentrate by looking straight to his eyes while talking and my mind couldnt be more disturbed of the inappropriateness at what he's doing while talking to me. I just had to end our 'conversation' and quickly fled out the mensroom. i couldnt concentrate on work that day coz the california roll sushi image was still in my mind.

Worse, that was not the only time i experience it with him, but FOUR TIMES...i thot his behavior was unacceptable and very disgusting and kinda perverted. Referring to the first story about that porn i was watching, actually..its normal..well, its not exactly porn..its watching what guys do in the locker room. But is it normal for our culture to perform such act to other employees especially? am i being too rigid and not 'open' about it? then again..i think its fine..except the fact that his manhood is just...stuart little having a california roll sushi..yukkk..

Im Fat..

Since the day i returned back from Qatar, i knew i had gained a few kilo's..after a month past, all the fats have started to distribute around my entire body..especially, my tummy area and my face..Its so frustrating that i CANT FIT INTO ANY OF MY PANTS ANYMORE...i had to even unbuttoned my pants and cover them up with my also tight belt. i tried on my so called 'fattest' pants, and the result was devastating..im now officially.FAT.

I think i gained 2 inches of my waist line..i do want to gain a little extra pounds, but genetically maybe, the fats are all not well distributed..it always end up in my tummy, love handles and my cheeks..my ass is also lumpier, thats the good part.but other body parts, is just dissapointing..

i look like a hungry somalian kid who looks skinny but with a tummy all the way covering the eye view of land below..

Im planning to enroll gym probably in July with the help of Wan..who's a muscle fairy..hoping that i could get my body to be buffed, a flat tummy..nice rounded chest..with big arms..and no six packs..just a nicely build body and to fit into clothes wonderfully..wish me luck..that i will also be poorer of $156 monthly for the gym fees..and hoping i'll get better physique & better stamina to run my daily stressfull life..and crossing my fingers that no adik2 will come and distract me coz it is the headquarters of Gay men..not enuf that KLCC coffee cafe's are already the headquarters for meetings and usha-ing people there..the gym has to be on top of it..duhh..

I have some fellow frens who have been to the gym for almost 3 years...but looking at their physique, nada...well, i think it all depends..wheather u really workout or ur just "working out"..with all the muscle men surrounding you, i dont blame them..With my current physique, i dont think i'll be part of that..with the monthly fees equal to a Zara shirt that i can purchase monthly, i'll work hard...not to just look good, also to fit nicely into my body customed Zara shirts..waaaa...